Granted, the Pine Block boys posted some decent hitting numbers, but .233/.656 is an anemic, if not embarrassing response. I have no idea how you managed so many RBI, but 4 HRs is pathetic.
Now, Bat Boys, don't take this as a threat, but we'll be issuing a press release looking for some replacement parts. Just wanted to give you a heads up.
Throwers, what can you do against .214/.095, except win more games and keep the freaking ball in the park (12 HRs?). Nice job on the Ks ... again, but an infield dribbler on a good change-up is an out, too. You don't all have to throw high, supposedly-unhittable heat all of the time.
Felix, Felix. What are we gonna do? Highest ERA and WHIP on the staff. Your peers, Carmona, Shields, & Gaudin, are leaving you in the dust ... to say nothing of veterans, Roy and Johan. Even Braden Freaking Looper is out pitching you. Be a man. Punch a wall (left hand, please), kick in a door, throw the water cooler, go have sex with something ... we don't care. Just start racking up some innings and wins. Comprende?
--OTW Management
Ps: thanks for the help at catcher, Mr. Napoli, when Joe Mauer was on the DL. We may invite you back...soon.
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