Dear David Wright, Lance Berkman, and Paul Konerko,

Let's take a moment just to see where we're at, shall we?

David: 12 R, 0 HR, 4 RBI, 3 SB, .263, .700
Lance: 11 R, 2 HR, 9 RBI, 1 SB, .233, .714
Paul: 9 R, 3 HR, 15 RBI, 0 SB, .203, .693

As my second, third, and seventh draft picks (11, 22, and 54 overall), you are currently ranked down with such superstars as Rich Aurilia, Scott Hatteberg, Jhonny Peralta, and Mark Gredz . . . Grudzi . . . Gruzdilen . . . you know who I mean.

Yes, it's been cold. But I'm sure you yourselves, when you sit in the dugout and ponder your last hapless at-bat, are not thinking, "If only they let me wear a parka when I hit!" You're tougher than that and better than that. Please begin hitting like it.

1 comment:

Grandpa D said...

It was recently pointed out to us by the stats-minded owner of the Benchwarmers that Off The Wall's recent acquistion, Sluggin' Kelly Johnson, the burly 2B of the Atlanta Braves, has as many home runs (5) as this unlikely trio has combined. But then the GB'ers are leading the league so he gets no sympathy from this quarter. Go Kelly.

--OTW Fan Club